Hello, and welcome to Drabbletober. This is an occasional bonus episode, for the first of January, 2026.
January You
by Elizabeth Guilt
Join the gym. Run every morning. Go vegan. Two yoga classes. Read fifty new novels this year. Drink less. Do dry January! Learn Spanish. Get up early. Journal. Marie Kondo the spare bedroom, the kitchen, the whole house. Maybe try paleo?
Maybe not paleo. Is vegan paleo even possible? Is vegan possible? What the hell do vegans put in sandwiches?
The gym is expensive. Running hurts your knees. The yoga is fun, though. You blow dry January on the seventeenth, laughing with Kim over cocktails, speaking in broken Spanish.
Marie Kondo was right. Keep the things that bring you joy.
Welcome to 2026! If you are making new year's resolutions, then remember to be kind to yourself. There's plenty of good stuff about the old you.
As a minor point of order, I checked with my reference vegan and she assures me there are plenty of sandwich fillings from the mundane (fake ham) to the grandiose (crispy-fried tofu with lettuce and tomato) via hummus, marmite, avocado…